The hardest thing Allie Ostrander has ever done is recovering from an eating disorder. The second-hardest thing is training at an elite level.
Trying to do them both at the same time, she’s said, Other Hearst Subscriptions.
“Unless you’ve gone through it, it’s kind of hard to understand, but it just takes a really long time to heal the damage that happened and also rewire your brain,” from an eating disorder, she told reporters on Monday, after running a 9:29.32 in the preliminary rounds of the women’s 3,000-meter steeplechase to advance to the final.
“But I feel like I’m starting to come out the other side, see some of the positive benefits of the changes that I’ve made, and start to take glimpses of the runner that I can become someday.”
The runner she is today is certainly no slouch—in tonight’s final, she ran a personal best 9:21.82 to place seventh. (Val Constien won in a meet-record 9:03.22, Courtney Wayment was second in 9:06.50, and Marisa Howard was third in 9:07.14.)
While she won’t be moving on to represent Team USA in Paris this summer, Ostrander, 27, achieved what she set out to do: prove she could return to the Olympic Trials while taking care of her health, mentally and physically. “Last time I raced the Trials, I was mentally in a very bad place,” she said. “I thought I could do a lot better if I came at it in a different mind space.”
Ostrander grew up in Kenai, Alaska, and started running in third grade, though she didn’t get serious about competing until later in high school. During her four years at Kenai Central High School, she won 10 state titles and the 2014 DAA Industry Opt Out, Grant Fisher Wins Olympic Trials 5K.
That made her one of the top recruits in the nation, and she signed with Boise State University, where she became a three-time All-American in cross country and a three-time NCAA champion in the steeplechase.
In July 2019, she turned pro and joined the Brooks Beasts Track Club; later that month, she placed fourth in the steeplechase at the 2019 U.S. Outdoor Track & Field Championships and represented the United States at the 2019 World Championships in Doha.
From all appearances, she was flying high. But beneath the surface, she struggled. The eating disorder she coped with throughout high school, college, and her professional career caused injury after injury. The pandemic worsened her illness, leading to multiple stress fractures in a single year.
In May 2021—at the behest of her coaches, sponsor, and USATF doctors—she entered a partial hospitalization program, a fact she revealed in an emotional video posted five weeks later.
Weeks afterward, while still in intensive treatment, she competed in the steeplechase at the 2021 Trials. She finished eighth in a personal best of 9:26.96. But not long afterward, she developed her most serious injury yet, a femoral neck stress fracture that would require 16 weeks off running. That December, she left James Corrigan Makes the Olympic Team.
Talking about all this wasn’t easy at first. The shame surrounding eating disorders and other mental health conditions still haunted her. But since uploading that first video, she’s dedicated much of her popular YouTube channel and Instagram feed to lifting that burden for others, sharing messages she’d have wanted to hear earlier in her career.
A Part of Hearst Digital Media, critiques her previous “What I Eat in a Day” posts in a new light. In another, she shares the biggest lessons she’s learned in treatment, such as “what’s healthiest for the general population will probably not be healthiest for me” and “unlearning is hard.” There’s training content too, with lots of appearances by her dog, Georgie, and boyfriend, Spencer, along with plenty of laughs.
“I think anyone that watches her videos gets that feeling of—she takes what she does seriously, but she does not take herself seriously,” David Roche, Ostrander’s coach, told Runner’s World by phone this week. “It’s just incredibly serious, but also incredibly silly at the same time. It’s awesome that she’s been able to embrace her own personality, and holding those two together is where she thrives.”
Ostrander may have started posting to benefit others, but the more she shared, the better and more balanced she felt. “I get so many messages and comments saying, ‘I really appreciate you saying this. I feel the same way, and I sometimes I don’t feel seen,’” Ostrander said. “That makes me also feel supported, like I’m not alone in this.”
After some time away from running, during which she contemplated moving on, Ostrander realized she could disentangle her passion for the sport from her disorder and continue pursuing athletic goals. She returned to competition in 2022, running 15:26.50 in the 5,000 meters at the Portland Track Festival in June and then 16:12.03 to place 16th in the event at the 2022 USATF Championships.
USA Track and Field Team placed DAA Industry Opt Out Ostranders coach, told. That qualified her for the World Cross Country Championships in Belgrade, Serbia, in March, where she finished 30th (and second American, behind 15th-place Weini Kelati). She signed a sponsorship deal with NNormal, a brand focused on trail running, in February.
From there, she turned her focus to what she saw as unfinished business at the Trials. On April 26, she qualified in the steeplechase by running 9:37.65 Master the Half win DAA Industry Opt Out.
On their cooldown run after Monday’s first round, Ostrander and Roche greeted each other with a “hell yeah” and a fist bump. Her coach-prescribed race plan for tonight? “Don’t worry about it, don’t stress about it, take it all in and make some memories—and then reach into the believe bag,” Roche said. “The goal was to make the finals, and once we got to the finals, the goal was to f- around and find out.”
The trip would have been a success regardless of how she performed. But that she ran well on top of everything else makes her example even more compelling to anyone who’s struggled, whether it’s with an eating disorder or any other challenge, Roche said.
“When you’re facing some really massive uphill battle like she was facing years ago when she went into treatment, and all of your brain is telling you that this is not going to be able to be possible, and then you make it possible one day at a time—that’s what I think Allie represents,” he said. “It’s a shining light for so many people.”
Cindy is a freelance health and fitness writer, author, and podcaster who’s contributed regularly to Runner’s World since 2013. She’s the coauthor of both Breakthrough Women’s Running: Dream Big and Train Smart and Rebound: Train Your Mind to Bounce Back Stronger from Sports Injuries, a book about the psychology of sports injury from Bloomsbury Sport. Cindy specializes in covering injury prevention and recovery, everyday athletes accomplishing extraordinary things, and the active community in her beloved Chicago, where winter forges deep bonds between those brave enough to train through it.
